ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I want to walk on stilts...naked
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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