dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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