I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Randomize