Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
