I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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