very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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