My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
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