smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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