im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
