I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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