The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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