Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Randomize