69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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