Yo dont text me then not text me
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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