hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
