only if we run a train.
done.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
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