I only kidnapped one of them. chill
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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