shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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