ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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