That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Randomize
