She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
