thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
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