so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
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