he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
you win again, gameday.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Randomize
