How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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