i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
