Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize