well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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