i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Randomize
