I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize
