grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
