I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
