We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
