Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
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