Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
