I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
