she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
My vagina is officially offended.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
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