ugly people sure do ruin things
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Randomize
