ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
