how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
