He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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