Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize