so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize
