I don't think brook has ever known best
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
