Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
