I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
