i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
