She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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