well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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