do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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