You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
